Gospel of Saint John

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right good evening. So this is it this is the last lecture in the study of the Gospel of St. John

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your blessed your new pastor has a PhD in theology and he will be conducting his own Bible studies here so I will no longer be teaching at Our Lady of Mount Carmel.

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Please subscribe to

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the newsletter if you're interested to know where and when the next Bible study will happen.

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So we are going to close the Gospel of St. John and as you know by now we basically scratched the surface. The goal of this Bible study in 14 lecture was obviously not to go into the details of the Gospel itself which would be a wonderful thing to do but at this rhythm it would take three years and my intent my whole goal was to provide you with a roadmap so when you read the Gospel of St. John and I really hope you do regularly you at least have a map and you know how to enter this Gospel and understand St. John's intent his perspective what he's trying to do. So what we're going to do today is

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recap everything we've learned and then understand the closure of this Gospel. So we are

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we are now in at the dawn of Easter. Christ is going to raise from the dead

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but what is really interesting in the Gospel of St. John is that the risen Christ the rising from the dead of Jesus Christ is almost underwhelming.

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It takes only a couple of paragraphs and then St. John moves on.

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He doesn't dwell on the event

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and he does it purposefully.

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He does it purposefully.

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But what the risen Christ does when he rises when he when he's when he's risen

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what you will notice is that Jesus is not

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asking his apostles

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to look at him.

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He will only do it

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with St. Thomas

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because St. Thomas doesn't believe.

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Jesus is not asking them to look at him. What does he do? He gives them his peace.

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He breathes the Holy Spirit on them to forgive sins.

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He instructs them to feed his church.

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He restores St. Peter.

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And the final word is not remember me.

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His final word is follow me. So where is the focus of the risen Christ on the church? On the kingdom that he has already established. So the pattern is that the King has come.

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He has conquered the city,

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won it over, set his steward and left.

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And now the focus is on the governance of the city until the King returns.

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My point is that St. John is extremely realistic,

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which is ironic because we tend to think of this gospel as the mystical gospel.

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It's quite the opposite. He's not focused on mysticism. He's focused on realism.

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Put your hand in my, put your finger in my hand.

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It's physical. It's the touch. It's the presence. The physical reality is what Christ has won. And he wants our focus to be precisely on that.

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You see, there is a defect, a flaw. I will not call it a sin, but it's certainly a spiritual flaw in many of us where we confuse piety with holiness.

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We think

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that all that we need to do is go to mass, spray the rosary,

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say our prayers, and then we're saved. That is piety. Piety is the virtue that falls under justice.

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It's the virtue that allows us to give God his due, which is worship.

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What is interesting in the two final gospel, two final chapters of the gospel of St. John, there is no piety. Christ refused it.

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You can see it also in the gospel of St. Luke in the episode of Emmaus.

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Christ appears. He walks with them and hides himself. He veils himself from them.

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He doesn't want their piety. He wants their understanding.

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He illuminates their mind, their reason. They understand. They come to a point where their heart tells him, "Stay with us." Why? Because they understood. They didn't ask him to stay with them before he explained.

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Before he explained, they were, "What's wrong with you? We're the only one that didn't know what happened?" After he explained, "Stay with us." Their mind was illuminated. Their heart understood. They want him now to stay with them. What does he do? (Snap)

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He vanishes.

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Do not cling to Christ

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out of neediness.

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He doesn't want that.

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Cling to him out of sacrifice.

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That's what he wants, because then you'd be imitators of Christ. That's what St. John's telling us at the end of the gospel. "Yes, Christ is risen. Now roll up your sleeves. Get down to work."

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There is no romanticism.

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It's very realistic. Now,

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I told you that in the way the ancient wrote, they always conceived of their writing as a mountain.

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So unlike the modern, where basically the two most important chapters would be the introduction and the conclusion, for the ancients, it's the midpoint, because it's the summit of the mountain. It's the apex. That is the most important part of the write-up. It leads to that, and then everything else follows from it. Well, in the case of the gospel of St. John, it's an inverted mountain.

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It's essentially seen from earth. It's a valley.

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Why? Where do we start with the gospel of St. John? Where are the first words of the gospel of St. John?

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In the beginning was the word,

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and the word was with God, and the word is God. So where are we? On earth?

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No, we're in heaven. Where did the gospel ends?

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Back to heaven. See that?

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Where's the depth?

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The tomb.

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From heaven to the tomb, back to heaven.

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That is your journey.

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You are conceived in heaven.

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You will go to the tomb,

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and then you're destined for heaven.

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The gospel of St. John is a mirror of your own life, if you allow it.

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If you pattern your life on the gospel.

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The resurrection is not an appendix. It's the summit at the end of the journey.

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The resurrection reveals the fruitfulness of love.

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Don't focus.

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I guess I could say it this way. Do not focus on trying to go to heaven.

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Focus on loving.

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The fruit of that is heaven.

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Loving is what you should be doing.

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Heaven is the reward.

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And just as

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you tell the kid not to focus on the cake, but to do their assignments, to finish their homeworks and do their chores, and the cake will follow, same for us. Focus on loving.

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Worry less love more. Mother Teresa used to say love or give. In her case, she was talking about generosity. It's the same thing. I would say love until it hurts.

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Love until it hurts.

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So we've covered this whole course and now we are at the end or I should say at the beginning.

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Because the resurrection is the beginning. It is the key that enables us, every one of us and the entire church to do the impossible.

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Apart from grace, you can do nothing.

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But with grace, you can do everything.

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And now grace is given

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so that

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we can obey the law, the Ten Commandments.

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And love God as God wants us to love Him. There are a lot of people who love God and love other people the way they want to love.

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are a lot of people who love God and love others the way they want to love, not the way God and others want to be loved by them.

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But if I love you the way I want to love you, I'm pleasing myself. I'm being selfish. That is self-serving love. But if I love you the way you want to be loved, I'm

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a servant of yours.

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Choose wisely.

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The whole gospel, therefore,

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is

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a new creation

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and a mission,

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shepherded by Christ

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through the ministry of the Pope.

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So if there is one final charge I will give you is this. Do not leave the gospel of Saint John here when you go out. A lot of people, a lot of Christians kind of live in two parallel worlds.

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There is the world of the scripture, which they open up every Sunday for a couple of hours. And they neatly close it back and then they go back to the real world.

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And the two are divorced.

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Don't do that.

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This is the pattern according to which you should be living your life.

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Christ is the strong party. He is your Lord. He is your God. He is in command. He decides everything about you.

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He gave us a command. You follow Him, He will bless you. You don't, He will curse you.

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You don't send yourself to hell no more than you send yourself to heaven. You don't have that power. When you die, you will go before Him for your personal judgment. He will be your king and He will pronounce

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Two different words.

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To hell or to heaven.

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That is our reality and it's inescapable.

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And in this gospel, Saint John shows us what we're supposed to

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So again, if you're going to have questions, you can send them anonymously through this.

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And I hope, I really, really pray and I hope that you're starting to restructure, like I told you before, the way you pray. That you're putting less emphasis on your prayers for petition and more emphasis on being present before your Lord and God. And if you want to know how to do that and do it well, spend a lot of time meditating on this one scene from the gospel of Saint John where Saint Mary is sitting at the feet of Christ and listening to Him.

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Spend a lot of time meditating on

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So how do you listen to Christ? Well, you read the gospel, you read a homily, you study the word and then you close your eyes and let the Holy Spirit guide

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And set your worries aside, set your prayers of petition aside

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and open yourself to the presence of God.

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You do that, you start to become a real Christian

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in the full sense of the word. I'm not saying that those who are in prayers of petition are not real Christians. So this is a hard word. I shouldn't be saying it this way. But what I mean is that you start to be really on the journey of holiness to become holy because if you can't become holy, you will not enter heaven. I told you this before and I'll repeat it. Good people go to hell.

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Holy people go to purgatory.

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Saints go to heaven. You want to go to heaven? Become a saint.

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Being good is not enough.

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That's the journey. Again, choose wisely. So now please stand and let's begin with the word of prayer. In the name of the Father, of the Son, of the Holy Spirit, Amen. Come Holy Spirit, fill the hearts of your faithful and kindle in them the fire of your love. Send forth your spirit and they shall be created and you shall renew the face of the earth. Oh God, who by the light of the Holy Spirit did instruct the hearts of the faithful, grant by the same Holy Spirit, we may be truly wise and ever enjoy his consolations through Christ our Lord. Amen. Our Lady of Wisdom,

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Saint John, all the angels and saints, in the name of the Father, of the Son, of the Holy Spirit, Amen. Please be seated. Even, you see, even in this prayer, I don't know if you notice,

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come Holy Spirit, fill the hearts of your faithful and kindle in them the fire of your love. So that's the grace that comes from God. Send forth your spirit and they shall be created. So that's a new creation in the resurrection of Christ.

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And then when that happens, the face of the earth is renewed.

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Now, what's really interesting is the next two verses. Oh God, who by the light of the Holy Spirit did what? Love, have mercy. No, did instruct

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the hearts. I love that combo. Not the minds, the hearts.

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Knowledge of God isn't just in the mind because if that's the case, Satan is the one who has the greatest faith. He knows more about God than any of us does in one sense. And another is completely ignorant because it's not his heart that has been instructed.

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But the instruction of the heart goes through your mind. You've got to understand your faith. You've got to understand what you're supposed to do. I'll give you an example. A lot of Christians, a lot of young Christians especially, think they know the faith because they go to Sunday Mass, but they have no qualm getting drunk.

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And getting drunk is a grave matter and could be a moral sin. They don't know that, you see.

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How will they know that? They need to be instructed. They need to seek that instruction. And then grant that by the same Holy Spirit we may be what? Filled with mercy?

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No, truly wise wisdom.

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And then when you are truly wise, what happens?

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You can enjoy his consolations.

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Recapitulation of the gospel. In the beginning, St. John opens his creation. He opens with creation. It's a new creation. In the beginning was the word.

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And then there is the first day of the week. So we go to the first week mirroring Genesis, but unlike Genesis, the first week ends at Cana

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a wedding feast.

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And so the resurrection is not merely a return from death.

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The resurrection of Christ, it is the celebration of this wedding feast. In fact, we call the Mass the wedding feast of the Lamb.

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Every time you go to Mass, you're going to a wedding. So dress appropriately.

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go from darkness to light.

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Before the coming of Christ, the world is in darkness before creation. The Holy Spirit, the Spirit of God is hovering over the chaos, over darkness. And then through the act of creation, through the grace of God, light comes into the world.

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And then you can see that when St. Mary of Magdalene go to the tomb

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and she doesn't find Christ. She goes into the tomb, look into the darkness of the tomb, does not find her Lord.

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They have taken him away.

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Many of us live through that experience. Many of us, and I don't have to ask you to raise your hand,

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have gone through phases in our lives where our heart is like a tomb and it's empty and Christ isn't there. And we say, where is God?

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Where is God? They have taken. My Lord away.

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St. John purposefully starts the resurrection with that anguish.

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To teach us that we're not going to find him

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where we look.

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And the reason why we're not going to find Christ where we look is because Christ wants to teach us that we are never in control.

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He is.

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It is his hour. It is his time. It is his salvation, not ours.

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And so he comes to her where?

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Outside, in the light. And what happens to her?

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She doesn't recognize

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She doesn't recognize him. Why? Why is Christ veiling himself from her?

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see, I always chuckle when I go to the Latin right mass and was saying the Confite or

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I confess.

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what do we say in that prayer?

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And to you,

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I want to hear you say,

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my brothers and sisters, now I want you to stop right there and think about yourself in that liturgy and ask yourself this question. When you say those words,

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do you really mean them when you look around you?

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Are these people all around you, your brothers and sisters?

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No, they're not.

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You don't treat them like your brothers and sisters. Nobody talks to anybody. Or if there are your brothers and sisters, everybody's estranged. It's a broken family.

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Everybody gets up and leaves.

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They could die the following day and they wouldn't care.

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That's why he veils himself.

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Christ is veiled in the brother and sister. He's veiled in the people around you. And so you want to see Christ? Guess what? Next time you say that prayer, look at the people around you. Look really, try to see them.

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Forget about yourself. Try to see them for what and who they are. Then you will see Christ.

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That's the hyper realism of this gospel.

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There's nothing mystical about it. It's hyper realistic.

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Christ is veiled until you can see him in your brother and your sister. What does it mean to see Christ and your brother and your sister? It doesn't mean you're going to see Jesus Christ. It means that your love to Jesus flows through them.

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Hard, isn't it? It's hard because we try to do it on by our own strength and we cannot do it. It's the grace of God that enables us to do this.

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So the darkness is real. The darkness that you find, the anxiety that the world is causing you, that is real. But it is real in a temporary way. It is not final.

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It is not final.

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Jesus

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was born and began his mission. And then what did he do? He went to the Samaritans. He went to the Samaritans and spoke to this one Samaritan woman at the well. And then after he was risen, what does he do?

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He,

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through

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Mary and the woman, is asking the apostles to do the exact same thing. He said, "Go to the ends of the world and make disciples of all nations." By the way, that commission at the end of the Gospel of St. Matthew is often really misunderstood. Christ did not commission the apostles and the church to go and make disciples in every nation.

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was not the commission. The commission is not to go and make disciples in every nation. The commission is go and make disciples of every nation. This is covenantal.

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It is so that every nation submits to the covenant of God and institutes rules and governance that make it possible for people, for grace to flow and for people to go to heaven.

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So again,

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the political order is extremely important to God.

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But the way to attain the change is not without grace. It is the grace of God through sanctity that changes people and get them to establish rules that are appropriate for grace to flow.

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And when grace

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withdraw, when holiness withdraw, you can see that the rules of men revert away from virtue to vice.

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And God always expects his church to triumph, which is why he's not going to raise a magic wand and get the world fixed up because we want to sit in our lazy butts and do nothing.

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Not going to happen this way.

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So from the risen Christ through the apostles, the church spreads to the whole nation, to all of the nation. And the intent is to always remember he's the one in charge. He is the king of kings.

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He is the ruler. Nothing happens here that escapes his notice or attention. He knows about everything. Everything that is happening right now is completely and entirely under his control, which means the only one you need to worry about, the only one that matters is Christ.

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He's the only one you need to take really seriously. Everything else follows.

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doesn't want to move this way. Fine.

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All the signs point to Easter. All the signs throughout the entire gospel point to the resurrection. Why? Because Christ from the very beginning, from the time he was still in heaven, not even incarnate, knew how this will end. Knew that his victory was absolute and was certain. There was never a moment of doubt in his mind that his victory will be fulfilled. Can you live your life this way?

[00:22:45:09 - 00:23:00:24]
Can you live your life in a complete and profound sense of peace, that everything in your life, everything that happened, your failures, your regrets, the things that didn't go the way you want them to go,

[00:23:00:24 - 00:23:09:06]
your loneliness, your anxiety, all of it going to lead you to the resurrection. Can you live with that

[00:23:09:06 - 00:23:12:16]
That is the true measure of your faith. It's right there.

[00:23:12:16 - 00:23:19:24]
"Abide in my peace." That's what it means. Let nothing worry you. That's what it means.

[00:23:19:24 - 00:23:23:08]
Even when you are disturbed, even when you are

[00:23:24:18 - 00:23:33:08]
shaking to the very core of your being, even when things seems to be, even if it seems like the apocalypse, your personal apocalypse is at the door.

[00:23:34:17 - 00:23:36:22]
Can you abide in the peace of Christ?

[00:23:36:22 - 00:23:55:00]
And can you then act from that peace with that same certainty? So what does that mean? Let's say you're estranged from your children. Let's say they're not talking to you or from your brothers or your parents, whoever it is. Are you then able to go,

[00:23:55:00 - 00:23:58:03]
sit with them and humble yourself

[00:23:58:03 - 00:24:01:04]
and tell them how you feel and what you hope,

[00:24:01:04 - 00:24:16:12]
that you hope for reconciliation? Can you speak this way? Can you set aside what is your do? Can you set aside your sense of justice? Can you set your own pride and be crucified for their sake?

[00:24:16:12 - 00:24:22:04]
You are not going to be able to do that unless you have a certainty of your own

[00:24:22:04 - 00:24:23:01]
salvation.

[00:24:23:01 - 00:24:24:14]
But if you know,

[00:24:24:14 - 00:24:27:10]
if you have that sense that with Christ,

[00:24:27:10 - 00:24:28:15]
you will make it through.

[00:24:28:15 - 00:24:34:26]
And that's what animates you. That's what will give you hope. That's what will give you strength. That's what will make you merciful.

[00:24:34:26 - 00:24:36:22]
That's what will make you loving.

[00:24:36:22 - 00:24:39:19]
The strength of Christ and the certainty

[00:24:39:19 - 00:24:51:05]
that you matter, the certainty that you're not forgotten, the certainty that you're precious, the certainty that you will see the face of Christ if you persevere.

[00:24:51:05 - 00:25:05:00]
That's what will motivate you. That's what changes the world. The saints did not change the world just because they sacrificed. The sacrificial love of the saints was the expression of their certainty, of their hope.

[00:25:05:00 - 00:25:08:05]
That was the expression of what they received.

[00:25:08:05 - 00:25:11:20]
Because they can't give unless they have something to give.

[00:25:11:20 - 00:25:16:01]
That's the gospel. That's St. John. That's what he's calling us to do. Can you do that?

[00:25:16:01 - 00:25:21:28]
Can you forget about your own petitions and you can start thinking about what God wants from you and do it.

[00:25:21:28 - 00:25:26:05]
So then destroy this temple and I will raise it up in three days.

[00:25:27:14 - 00:25:28:12]
And he did that.

[00:25:28:12 - 00:25:35:26]
The blood and water flowed from his side. This is the sacramental life of the church beginning from the new Adam.

[00:25:35:26 - 00:25:43:25]
And then every one of us, like he told Nicodemus, was going to be born of water and the spirit. Everything he said he fulfilled.

[00:25:43:25 - 00:25:46:24]
And then Jesus breathes the spirit on the apostle.

[00:25:46:24 - 00:25:48:19]
Then

[00:25:48:19 - 00:26:06:09]
he makes certain that the apostle and the church and all those who follow him will always be equipped with what they need. The sacraments are the mysteries. They are the way in which Christ equip us with everything we need

[00:26:06:09 - 00:26:07:08]
to do his will.

[00:26:07:08 - 00:26:22:27]
Here's another measure of your faith. If you're at mass during consecration and somebody comes running into the church and says, "Our lady has appeared outside." And it was true. Our lady appeared outside. What do you do?

[00:26:22:27 - 00:26:24:22]
you leave,

[00:26:24:22 - 00:26:26:09]
then you don't believe.

[00:26:26:09 - 00:26:30:05]
Because right in front of you is the greatest possible miracle.

[00:26:30:05 - 00:26:36:25]
There is no greater miracle than the Eucharist. None. Not even our lady.

[00:26:36:25 - 00:26:40:04]
I'm not saying what she does. I'm just throwing a hypothetical here.

[00:26:40:04 - 00:26:45:07]
The point is, where is your heart at? Is it in the sensational?

[00:26:45:07 - 00:26:46:25]
Or is it what is real?

[00:26:46:25 - 00:26:52:03]
The Eucharist is what feeds you, provided you're in a state of grace.

[00:26:52:03 - 00:27:10:20]
Christ three times is going to tell Peter, "Feed my sheep. Feed my sheep. Feed my sheep." But in order for Peter to feed his sheep, what does he need? Really interesting. Christ, and we'll see it. If we get to it, I don't know. Didn't tell Peter right away, "Feed my sheep." What was the first question he asked him?

[00:27:10:20 - 00:27:27:24]
Simon, son of John, do you want to tell Peter to feed his sheep? Do you what? Love me. And Simon, son of John, said, "Yes, Lord, you know that I love you. Feed my sheep." So what do you need first?

[00:27:27:24 - 00:27:31:02]
To feed the sheep. What do you need? There you go.

[00:27:31:02 - 00:27:31:29]
There you go.

[00:27:31:29 - 00:28:01:09]
So is Christ the center of your life? Is he truly the one abiding person in your life? Is he the center? Is the cross planted in your heart? Is your life revolving around the cross? Is the cross the sun and your planet around the cross? Or is the cross marginally there and your heart is somewhere in your phone and when you're scrolling and in your friends and your work and your hopes and the rest of it?

[00:28:01:09 - 00:28:05:28]
The distance between the cross and the center of your life is the measure of your anxiety.

[00:28:05:28 - 00:28:12:07]
It's that simple. Anxiety is a wonderful thing because it tells you where you need to grow.

[00:28:12:07 - 00:28:39:19]
You use it as a measure to know, "Oh, well, you know, I'm not there yet." No, we're not there yet. All of us are not there yet. Most of us are not there yet. There are a few exceptions, but we're not there yet. We know that we're not there yet. The point isn't about performance. The point isn't about to beat ourselves because we're not doing exactly what we need. We're not sent to his little child, Jesus. We're not by the repeal. We know that. Christ knows that. That's not what the question is. The question is, when you know, here's the distance, what

[00:28:39:19 - 00:28:44:05]
You turn to Christ and you say, "It's me. Please help me."

[00:28:44:05 - 00:28:46:23]
you do that or you just ignore him

[00:28:46:23 - 00:28:50:04]
then complain to him because you didn't get what you want?

[00:28:50:04 - 00:28:55:25]
all there is to it. He knows where we are, but let's be like sit at his feet

[00:28:55:25 - 00:28:56:29]
and then wait.

[00:28:56:29 - 00:29:04:18]
it was Philip and Andrew who was sent from St. John, the Baptist, to Jesus.

[00:29:05:19 - 00:29:16:28]
And then they asked him, "Rabbi, where do you stay? What did Jesus say to them? Come and see." So now we go from come and see, come and see to put your finger here.

[00:29:16:28 - 00:29:23:02]
Watch what Christ does. St. Thomas being hyper, hyper-realistic,

[00:29:23:02 - 00:29:26:24]
wants to experiment Christ

[00:29:26:24 - 00:29:29:09]
unless I put my finger

[00:29:29:09 - 00:29:33:00]
in his hand and my hand and his side, I'm not going to believe.

[00:29:33:00 - 00:29:46:06]
What I found always fascinating with St. Thomas, and this is fascinating, I've never heard anybody try to answer this, is that how did he know that Christ will have his wounds when he's risen? How did St. Thomas know that?

[00:29:46:06 - 00:29:48:11]
I mean, it's not obvious, is it?

[00:29:48:11 - 00:29:50:07]
I mean, he doesn't have,

[00:29:50:07 - 00:30:04:15]
you know, like a double blind study where you have a bunch of people who rose from the dead and those who didn't to be able to say, "Ah, if somebody rises from the dead, he's going to look like this." So how did he know that he will still have the wounds?

[00:30:04:15 - 00:30:16:15]
It's fascinating. So St. Thomas is really a very interesting saint. That's why he's also, I think, the patron saint of scientists, right? Because he is focused on the detail. Now watch what Christ does.

[00:30:16:15 - 00:30:19:04]
Christ meets him exactly where he is

[00:30:19:04 - 00:30:47:19]
Come here, Thomas. So he does his second appearance, I think, precisely for St. Thomas. So he shows up again and says, "Come over here. Put your finger and put your hand. Do not be disbelieving but believe." And then St. Thomas gave us the most beautiful proclamation of faith that hopefully we all say during the elevation, right? "My Lord and my God."

[00:30:47:19 - 00:30:56:26]
"My Lord and my God." The Lord is the one who has control over your life. He understood what he was saying. "My Lord and my God."

[00:30:56:26 - 00:31:17:03]
And then our Lord is not simply rebuking St. Thomas. It's not just a rebuke. It's not a setup, you see? Jesus always did that. He met people where they are at and then he's going to take them a distance. So Jesus loves you the way you are. Absolutely. Yeah, I'm sure you've heard that.

[00:31:17:03 - 00:31:19:07]
But he loves you too much

[00:31:19:07 - 00:31:20:22]
to keep you where you are.

[00:31:20:22 - 00:31:22:08]
So what does he tell him?

[00:31:22:08 - 00:31:25:20]
Have you believed because you have seen and touched?

[00:31:25:20 - 00:31:26:15]
Now he takes him to the

[00:31:26:15 - 00:31:28:10]
Blessed are those

[00:31:28:10 - 00:31:30:07]
who believe without seeing and touching,

[00:31:30:07 - 00:31:33:15]
So that's a journey. That's the mission for St. Thomas, personally.

[00:31:33:15 - 00:31:38:20]
That's his job. He's going to have to believe without seeing and

[00:31:38:20 - 00:31:44:02]
You see, Christ always illuminates our minds to tell us what he expects from

[00:31:44:02 - 00:31:50:13]
So you know, all these prayers that you prayed and are not answered? Yeah, they actually have been answered.

[00:31:50:13 - 00:31:58:00]
Because what Christ is telling you is, "I am not going to give you a supernatural answer. I'm not going to wave a magic wand and make it work for you.

[00:31:58:00 - 00:32:03:26]
But I'm going to be with you every step of the way as you work at

[00:32:03:26 - 00:32:19:10]
As you understand what that thing that you're trying to do look like, as you grow in wisdom, as that experience that you gain from that effort, I'm going to be able to use to guide others."

[00:32:19:10 - 00:32:27:17]
Slothfulness is one of the vices that is probably with hypocrisy. The least confessed.

[00:32:27:17 - 00:32:31:14]
I don't know how many people go to a priest that actually confess. I've been a hypocrite

[00:32:32:16 - 00:32:33:11]
and I've been lazy.

[00:32:33:11 - 00:32:56:21]
I'm sure there's quite a few confessions that happens about lust and about gossip and about maybe greed and about jealousy and envy and about eating too much, gluttony, that sort of thing. But for whatever reason, slothfulness and indifference and hypocrisy,

[00:32:56:21 - 00:32:58:07]
we're good.

[00:32:58:07 - 00:33:10:15]
These yet are endemic sins, are vices that are very endemic. They're in all of us because they are the result of concupiscence and they lurk in the background. They just lurk.

[00:33:10:15 - 00:33:51:15]
the whole gospel then from beginning to end of the Gospel of St. John is Christ has come to conquer. He conquers, changes the liturgy of the Old Testament into the New, change it from symbol to reality, and then establishes his kingdom and shows us the way. And the way, like we have no issue. We track really, really well with Christ's victory, with him establishing the kingdom. We have no problem in being a king. We're good with all of this. The one itsy-bity problem that we have issues with is the cross.

[00:33:51:15 - 00:33:52:21]
Come down from the cross and we'll

[00:33:52:21 - 00:33:54:24]
Come down from the cross, be supermen,

[00:33:54:24 - 00:33:56:07]
and we'll all believe.

[00:33:56:07 - 00:33:57:24]
It's the way

[00:33:57:24 - 00:33:59:22]
that gives us the heartburn.

[00:33:59:22 - 00:34:25:07]
But it is precisely this way that teaches us about the love of God. It is this way that is going to help us to do what Christ did. I showed you before that in his passion, he recapitulated the curse of Adam and Eve. He took it all upon himself and then he transferred it into victory. What he did, is what we

[00:34:25:07 - 00:34:26:02]
The

[00:34:26:02 - 00:34:31:25]
effect of original sin that live in us, that's what we must take, transfigure,

[00:34:33:07 - 00:34:39:10]
and turn into holiness. That's what he wants. That's what we don't want.

[00:34:39:10 - 00:34:55:01]
And that's where the tension is. That's the reality of it. So instead, what do we do? Instead of really sitting and facing this problem and then wrestling with it like Jacob did with the angel, we like to run away.

[00:34:55:01 - 00:35:03:10]
And then when we run away, we start complaining. We complain about the church, we complain about the priest, we complain about God, we find somebody to complain about.

[00:35:03:10 - 00:35:09:13]
Because we're just running away. If you're busy with that wrestling, you won't have much time to complain.

[00:35:09:13 - 00:35:14:11]
Because you're doing God's will, you're doing the work of God, which is all interior first.

[00:35:14:11 - 00:35:32:18]
So as I told you, Mary comes to the garden, she comes in darkness, in sorrow, and she's in loss. She has nothing left. They've taken her Lord away. She lost everything. In losing Jesus, Mary lost everything.

[00:35:32:18 - 00:35:38:27]
Yet she's compelled by love. It is love that compels her through this loss to come.

[00:35:38:27 - 00:35:49:28]
She can't find him in darkness. And when she goes out, she mistakes him for a gardener. Which is really interesting because a gardener is the one who tills a garden.

[00:35:49:28 - 00:36:07:07]
So she sees him for who he is, but doesn't recognize him for who he is because in her mind, in her conception, she wants the Jesus that she loves. She doesn't see the Jesus, the new Adam, in a new garden, transforming the world.

[00:36:07:07 - 00:36:18:10]
That's why he hides himself from her because he loves her. He wants her to see him as he is, not as she wants to see him.

[00:36:18:10 - 00:36:25:18]
We have always a tendency to take Jesus and turn him into a little statue that scratches where we itch.

[00:36:25:18 - 00:36:35:18]
The new Adam stands in the new garden. The shepherd calls his sheep by name. When he calls her, she recognizes him. When he calls

[00:36:35:18 - 00:36:37:12]
not when she calls him.

[00:36:37:12 - 00:36:40:02]
So when he calls you, you'll recognize

[00:36:40:02 - 00:36:43:28]
At his hour, where he wants to be, not yours,

[00:36:43:28 - 00:36:50:19]
but your one of the greatest and hardest spiritual exercise you can perform is waiting.

[00:36:50:19 - 00:36:58:19]
So here's a spiritual exercise for you to try. Sit, go before the Blessed Sacrament.

[00:36:59:20 - 00:37:04:25]
Use your phone for once for something useful. Put a timer on it, 10 minutes.

[00:37:04:25 - 00:37:08:11]
And then in those 10 minutes, all you're going to do is sit

[00:37:08:11 - 00:37:09:10]
and say nothing.

[00:37:09:10 - 00:37:10:14]
You're just going to listen.

[00:37:10:14 - 00:37:10:27]
10

[00:37:10:27 - 00:37:13:08]
And you'll find out how difficult that

[00:37:13:08 - 00:37:33:01]
Then you'd really be confronted with concupiscence acting up. Your mind is going to start to wander. You can't control it. It's going to go left and right. Think about what you're going to cook, what you're going to dress, your work, this. And it just, your mind is, it's not just your mind. It is concupiscence inside of

[00:37:33:01 - 00:37:36:06]
that wants to grab to stuff.

[00:37:36:06 - 00:37:48:29]
If you learn to do this bit by bit, you'll never overcome this. You can't, right? Just don't try to. The purpose here is not to become a Zen monk. The purpose here is to face your own failure

[00:37:50:00 - 00:37:55:14]
and still to sit in front of God failing and failing again and again and again and again.

[00:37:56:28 - 00:38:16:26]
There's this kid who went to Italy, spent the whole night waiting to be able to attend the Mass by Padre Pio. And then he got in, he was an American guy, got in Mass, and then throughout the entire Mass, his head was, "Oh, I'm going to go see soccer. I'm going to get a gelato. I'm going to go do this." And then there's Venice and the whole Mass.

[00:38:16:26 - 00:38:31:09]
Mass finished. He was sitting still on his, in the pew, in the bench, completely depressed. He missed the entire Mass, pretty much. Padre Pio was walking by, came over to him, patted him on the shoulder and said, "Good job. Good job."

[00:38:31:09 - 00:38:44:22]
point is he struggled with his own nature, didn't give up. The point is he waited on God. Only God's grace can calm your senses.

[00:38:44:22 - 00:39:06:04]
And then when that happens, if you persevere, it will happen. One, at one moment, you're praying and trying to sit in this and suddenly everything quiets down. It's almost like somebody shut down the power. Everything quiets down. No thoughts, no emotions, nothing. And you know what you will do when that happens?

[00:39:06:04 - 00:39:07:11]
You will start fidgeting

[00:39:07:11 - 00:39:09:01]
because it is not normal.

[00:39:09:01 - 00:39:11:27]
Like it's not normal. This is not, you start fighting it.

[00:39:11:27 - 00:39:18:10]
That is contemplation. It's when all your senses calm down. God has come into

[00:39:18:10 - 00:39:32:21]
If you want to read more about this, so you don't think, "I'm the one fabricating all that," pick up the Autobiography of Sinteresa of Avila. She describes this perfectly. And she talks about this in beautiful detail. Read the Autobiography of Sinteresa of Avila.

[00:39:32:21 - 00:39:47:08]
Now Peter, Peter and John, both of them run to the tomb. John being the youngest gets there first, but he doesn't get in. He waits. Peter gets in first.

[00:39:48:27 - 00:40:15:18]
So what does St. John represents and what does St. Peter represents? St. John, as we know, is written the gospel and is seen as the one who is mystical, contemplative. So oftentimes the contemplative branch of the church gets to the truth, gets to the to Christ faster than the hierarchical structure of the church.

[00:40:15:18 - 00:40:16:10]
So

[00:40:18:06 - 00:40:38:13]
the faithful, many of them, believed that our lady was immaculately conceived way earlier than the 1900s when the dogma was declared. As far back as 300, St. Ephraim, who is the doctor of the church, declared Mary to be immaculately conceived. And since then,

[00:40:39:29 - 00:40:52:10]
throughout Christendom, many contemplative souls accepted that our lady was immaculately conceived. But it took the hierarchical structure of the church that long to declare it.

[00:40:53:18 - 00:40:55:19]
What did St. John do? He waited.

[00:40:55:19 - 00:40:57:15]
He didn't get ahead of

[00:40:57:15 - 00:40:58:10]
the hierarchy.

[00:40:58:10 - 00:41:01:01]
So obedience to the church

[00:41:01:01 - 00:41:04:27]
is a hallmark of your life of faith.

[00:41:04:27 - 00:41:17:08]
When St. Peter was told that he couldn't celebrate Mass and listen to Confession and inhabit them for 10 years, 10 years, 10 years, he had a really good friend of his

[00:41:18:10 - 00:41:39:18]
who wrote a very elaborate letter in his defense to explain that he should be celebrating religion, this and then the other. And he came all proud and showed it to Padre Pio. Padre Pio tore the letter. He was choleric. Padre Pio had a, yeah, he tore the letter and threw the guy out and told him, "Who are you to criticize my mother?"

[00:41:39:18 - 00:41:43:00]
So obedience to the church is a hallmark

[00:41:43:00 - 00:41:44:26]
of a truly contemplative soul.

[00:41:44:26 - 00:41:57:22]
That doesn't mean you're not allowed to or you can't rightfully criticize a priest or a bishop. You can do that, but do it carefully and do it properly and always very respectfully.

[00:41:57:22 - 00:42:02:05]
The interesting thing is that St. Peter and St. John showed up

[00:42:02:05 - 00:42:03:17]
and they didn't see Christ.

[00:42:03:17 - 00:42:23:10]
Christ did not appear to them like he did to Mary, to St. Mary. Why? Because again, the focus is on the intellect. The focus is on the illumination of your intellect and the fostering of the love in your heart. The evidence were right in front of them.

[00:42:23:10 - 00:42:37:00]
Just using natural reason, looking at the evidence, the rolled stone and the testimony of Mary should lead them to believe that it is precisely what happened. And that's what Christ wants from us.

[00:42:37:00 - 00:42:50:13]
I mean, in one sense, especially for grownups, if an angel appears to you and starts explaining things to you, I mean, if that happened to me, if an angel appeared to me and started explaining things to me, in one sense, I'm going to be insulted.

[00:42:50:13 - 00:42:53:26]
Because what he's basically telling me is that I didn't use my reason.

[00:42:53:26 - 00:42:55:12]
Right, I was kind of lazy.

[00:42:55:12 - 00:43:09:19]
There is no need to bother our lady with all these apparitions. There's no need to bother our angels and the saints with all these things. Why? God gave us everything we need in the church and the sacraments. Why are these things happening?

[00:43:09:19 - 00:43:16:23]
Then the apostles are in the upper room and the doors are locked. They're living in fear.

[00:43:16:23 - 00:43:21:17]
Okay, they're living in fear. So if you're afraid, if you're anxious, you're in good company.

[00:43:21:17 - 00:43:28:10]
Those people, those men who were afraid, those are the same men who now we celebrate as saints.

[00:43:28:10 - 00:43:40:25]
So God, Christ didn't take perfect guys and turn them into saints. Like they don't belong to us, exclusive club that we don't have access to. They're just like us.

[00:43:40:25 - 00:43:49:08]
They're just like us. God loves to take a mess and turn it into perfection. Loves to do that.

[00:43:49:08 - 00:43:59:01]
Think about it. Who was St. Peter? He was a betrayer. He was impulsive, full of himself, and he betrayed his Lord.

[00:43:59:01 - 00:44:02:04]
Who's St. Paul? A murderer.

[00:44:02:04 - 00:44:08:21]
So Jesus took a betrayer and a murderer and made them the foundation of the church.

[00:44:08:21 - 00:44:16:12]
So what does that say? It's all about his glory. It's what he can do. What if he can do that with them? Why can't he do that with you?

[00:44:16:12 - 00:44:23:08]
It's not about you. It's not about your limitations. It's not about what you can't do. It's about whether you're willing to love him.

[00:44:23:08 - 00:44:25:09]
He breathed onto them.

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So the coming of the Holy Spirit and the reason why the Holy Spirit had to come is so that we understand that we all live in the consolation of the Holy Spirit. So one thing you can also do is to, you know, you should try to develop a, I wouldn't call it a personal relationship. Personally, I don't like that expression. This expression is not found anywhere in the scripture. Nowhere in the scripture does it say you need to develop a personal relationship. There's something about it that always bugged me. And I can't tell you exactly what, but I just don't like that. Rather, I would say you should learn to adore

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God the Father,

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God the Son, and God the Holy Spirit individually.

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You should develop an attitude of adoration before the three persons of the Holy Spirit, of the Trinity.

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I think there is something fundamental about knowing ultimately the three members of the family are going to belong to.

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And if you start to do that, I sense that your attitude towards will shift

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because it's in loving God that you can love your brother and sister, not the other way around.

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And then obviously Christ gives them the most important tool, the most important. The one, if you really, if you want to summarize everything that Christ did, he came so that sin can be forgiven because before his coming, sin could not be forgiven.

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After his coming, sin can be forgiven. If you lived before Christ, your sins could not be forgiven. There was not a power on earth that could do that.

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This is why he said kings and prophets wish to see what you see and hear what you hear and they didn't, but it gives them the forgiveness of sins. Now it's so easy. You'll go to confession

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and then you hear those words.

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So we talked about St. Thomas, my Lord and my God.

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And then St. John reminds us that our Lord did many, many more things, but these things were with why? So you may believe. Now what is belief? Again, remember, belief, faith is not an act of the will. It's not purely an act of the will. It's not like you're lifting weight.

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Faith is the order of two plus two equal four. Faith is certainty. It's intellectual certainty.

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That's what faith is. It's the illumination of your intellect.

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Once you know that two plus two equal four, you don't have to believe that two plus two equal four. You use it. You start to act with it. Faith is like that. Unfortunately, many people think that faith is a sort of a mystical thing. We have to have this experience and feelings and now you have faith. Now it's the illumination of your intellect. Why? Because God is intellect.

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God is a spirit. There's no body, but he's an intellect. And the reason why we're made in his image is precisely because of the intellect and the will and obviously the whole body. But the intellect plays a critical role in being configured to God. And so your intellect needs to be configured according to the truth.

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That's why we do these studies. That's why you learn. That's why you read so you can be configured and made in the image of God.

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I would say that for any believer, and by the way, you don't have to sit in a Bible study to know that a lot of people learn about the faith by being gardeners.

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There are a lot of astronomers learn about the faith by observing the stars.

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There are many, many ways in which you can learn. A teacher at school can be learning about God by teaching children. A nurse can be learning about serving others. I am not by any means saying that you have to have a formal study. You have to have degree in theology. Not at all. I'm saying your intellect has to be constantly formed, illuminated.

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So understand faith is the intellect. It's illumination of your intellect, not lifting weight, not making an effort.

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That is hope.

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This has been given to you may believe. So you read the gospels and you illuminate your mind so that your faith is deepened and your life becomes configured to the gospel. And you see in your life the recapitulation of the entire gospel.

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And then they may be leaving. You may have in his name. You see that? When your intellect is illuminated and then you come to believe, like the prayer said earlier, then you can have life. Why? Because you're open to the grace of God. The grace of God will not force itself upon you without your consent. God graced is not forced upon you. And you receive, God may give you, let's say, a grace

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that is the size of this room.

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But what you receive out of this grace depends on your

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understanding, on the illumination of your own intellect.

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So if people are distracted and busy and not thinking about God, the cross is not the center of their life, what they do, what their every moment of their life, they're not paying attention and unattentive to God's presence in their life. Then an understanding that everything that happens to them, everybody they meet, everything they say, everything they hear is God speaking to them, then they are blind, they're deaf. How could grace reach them? It's impossible.

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That's what the gospel was given. So you may believe.

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And then

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we'll end with the scene here because they went fishing all night and caught nothing. Again, your human effort will be futile. But the futility of it has a purpose. The futility of it is to show you God.

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And so dawn breaks and you know, fishing has to happen during the night.

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Because the fish are quiet. That's how you catch them. They're not swimming all over the place. So dawn comes and things are inverted. You're not supposed to be able to catch fish. And they catch 143 or whatever the number is. Don't quote me. I'm not a Protestant. I don't those things by heart. And then St. Peter alone dragged the net to shore. Why is the number important? Because at the time, this was the number of the nations. This was the known number of all nations.

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So the image is striking. It is the Pope who represents the entire church is dragging the entire net, all nations to Christ. But the fish must be transformed by fire.

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So the working of the church here alone is not enough. It's the Holy Spirit that transforms everything to make a people of God.

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what happens in the presence of Christ. And the final commission is given. It's given to the entire church. It's given to each one of us in the people you meet every day.

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And the goal isn't to look for results. The goal is to plant seeds and move on. You meet somebody, you say one thing. You may not say anything. You may smile. You may be right there present when they are going sorrow. The goal is that you planted a seed. Don't look for results. There's a beautiful Lebanese proverb that says, "Do good and throw it in the sea."

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The idea behind it is that when you do something good

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and you throw it in the sea, you won't remember. You can't find it again.

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So don't remember the good that you do. Let it go. Just do it and move on.

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This is how we live our life. This is what we're supposed to do. So I hope through the study of the Gospel of Saint John, you have in your hand a roadmap.

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I hope you actually will go to Corbono and listen to these lectures two or three times because sometimes that's what it takes for our mind to get configured. So this becomes a way of living, not just a way of listening to a Bible study, but a way in which you will live your life. And it will transform you and the people around you,

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which is my hope,

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which is why the church exists, which is why we

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talk to each other, care for each other, and love each other. God bless you. Let's stand and finish with the word of prayer. Now we'll take a quick break and we'll come back for questions.

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In the name of the Father, of the Son, of the Holy Spirit, Amen.

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Lord, we want to thank you and praise you and glorify you for this Bible study, for all the good intentions that you've given us, for the illuminations in our heart and

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now, Lord, we ask you to send the Holy Spirit through the intercession of our Lady so we can put into effect what you have given us, what you've inspired us to do. And we ask this as we all pray, Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee, blessed art thou among women, and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus, Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners now and at the hour of our death, Amen. Saint Joseph, Saint John, all the saints and angels, in the name of the Father, of the Son, of the Holy Spirit, Amen.

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And as I said at the beginning of this lecture, this is the last

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on the Gospel of Saint John and the new pastor has indicated that he will be actually doing his own Bible study. So you're blessed to have a pastor who's going to do his Bible study, you know, attend to him. If you want to know what we're going to do with Corbono, please subscribe to the newsletter. That'd be the only way for me to reach you. God bless you if you have to go. Thank you for coming. And then otherwise, stay with us for a few minutes and then we'll take questions. Thank you.

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